People often conceal their real message. Understanding the real message requires the listener to calibrate to the subject's communication patterns. A change in that communication pattern may be a clue as to the message's true meaning. For example, the subject may change his/her breathing pattern, speech pattern, word pronunciation, eye movement, handwriting, etc. and that change may signal a change in meaning, a different meaning than the literal meaning of the communication element(s) used. 

To understand the true meaning of communication between two people, the speaker and listener must mutually understand each and every communication element of the message. Each must know what was said and why and what wasn’t said and why not.